3 Ring Circus

Hospital Stays and Strawberry Shakes

2010-11-17T09:09:00.028-07:00

Well, what we have there is what Noah ate at every meal while he was in the hospital.

A Strawberry Shake

"Why is everything so grim, once the Strawberry Shake is gone?"

-Noah Griffith

When they finally lifted his surgery orders, and let him order room service after not eating in over a day, he was STARVING! The one thing that stuck out from that first meal, was the shake. I told him I didn't care if he ate 100 shakes, as long as he got better. He proceeded to order one with every meal, including breakfast, and I kept my word and let him, as he kept his word and continued to get better.

It has been well over two months since Noah was hospitalized, and to be honest, it has taken me this long to feel good enough to write it all down, and reflect on it. It takes a lot out of a parent emotionally, and even still, we have unanswered questions, but he seems to have recovered, and we will continue to hope for the best possible outcome from here on out.

The long waited diagnosis.....

Noah was very sick with everything ranging from a cold to the stomach flu for a week. He missed his schools Archaeological Dig and camp out that he had so been looking forward to. Sunday night, when we put him to bed, we had a well recovered kid on our hands who was looking forward to returning to school the next day. That was, until 4:00 in the morning.

Gabe woke me up saying Noah is in a lot of pain and I think we need to take him to Primary Children's Hospital. I was confused since he was getting better, and even more scared, because Gabe is the calm one who is always there to tell me things are fine, lets just give it time. Yet, there he was, panicking and saying we need to go....NOW.

Noah was holding his right lower side and crying out in pain. I sat in the back seat with him on the way to the hospital frantically doing a Google search for the symptoms of an appendicitis. That had to be what was happening, the description was dead on. I knew he would have to have surgery, but I kept telling myself it was okay, it is quick, and we would be home in a few hours. I was wrong, so so wrong.

His poor body went through so much that day, with the tests and procedures that gave us NO answers other than the following two things.

It was not his appendix

He has an enlarged liver and fluid is building up around it.

What does this mean? Well, to my surprise, his enlarged liver is directly related to his heart condition. This has been happening since he was 3 1/2 years old after his last open heart surgery. But they said that it is very unlikely that it was at all related to what was happening with him.

Here is a picture later that night after he was finally allowed to rest in his hospital room and get ready for the next day of more tests and possibly surgery, but who knows what for. He was drugged....can you tell?

I can not tell you the amount of confusion I felt. We ranged from "Noah is in Heart Failure, and there is nothing we can do", to, "Well...we will wait and see." He went in for a minor surgery where they drained the fluids that kept building up around his liver, and tested it to see what it was. Later that night was when we received the SBP diagnosis.

He did not handle coming out of anesthesia well at all, which has always been the case since he was an infant. Morphine and Noah are not the best of friends. He was kept sedated to the point where he was not feeling too much pain, but felt like having visitors.

That really put a smile on his face. It was what he needed, and it was what I needed to see.

His best friend Nick brought him a gummy hand.....leave it to Nick to make my kid laugh at the hospital. He also received a huge box of letters and cards from his school. My friend Leanne brought them up and we taped them up all over his room.

Another crazy visitor......

The Wilson's made him a Candy Gram, which everyone wanted, but I informed them that it was all for Noah. Sorry guys.

A gift from friends at work.

The next day he wanted some air, and we were able to get him outside. It was cold, and began to rain, but it felt like heaven. Any place without beeping machines and four walls was paradise to me.

After 5 days in the hospital, the Dr's asked me what I wanted to do. I said I wanted to be home, because I felt like he was feeling better. I layed in his bed every night at the hospital, and every night Noah layed there moaning in pain, and held on to me tight. The night before, he was calm, and he slept well, and even moved around to the point I could no longer hang out in the twin size bed with an 11 year old. They agreed, so we went home, with more appointments scheduled, and hopefully some more answers to come.

But not until his final meal......which although not pictured, included a Strawberry Shake.

(I began writing this last November, then December....and now it is May.)

I know it is out of order, a lot of it doesn't make sense and is incomplete. I am still up in the air as to what it all means, but we do know we have new worries, but pray that he continues to progress and do well.

Halloween Half Marathon

2010-11-02T08:44:00.003-06:00

I like to refer to this as

'The Race That Almost Wasn't'

Days before I was trying to decide if I should even do this run. Two weeks prior I had ran in The Moab Other Half Marathon, and sooo many things went wrong in that race, that they stuck with me and filled me with doubt. The day before I knew I wanted to run it, even though I would be going the full 13.1 miles without Gabe with me. The morning of, my alarm did not go off, and I was convinced it wouldn't happen. Gabe knew it would haunt me if I didn't try my hardest to get there, so we rushed out the door and headed to Provo. It would require him driving back to Salt Lake and get the kids ready and driving back to Provo again to see me finish, but he was more than happy to do it, in fact, he was pushing me out the door when I was seriously upset at myself for letting this happen and trying to decide how I was going to handle letting myself down. I will give a more in depth blog post on the race on my own personal weight loss blog, but for now, lets just say that I am SO HAPPY that I got my butt out the door that morning and I made myself proud, which isn't something I can say I do very often.

These are the moments I live for. Seeing the face of a smiling 6 year old who thinks his Mommy is amazing, no matter what. I can not explain what it feels like to be tired and worn out at this point of running 12 miles already, only to look up and see my family there holding homemade signs and cheering me on. You feel amazing and happy, and like everything you went through up until that moment lead you to them....just waiting to see you.

It is really hard to get a good picture when you are running,

but this one at least shows my cute Bumble Bee costume.

There are so many reasons this was the perfect race for me.....

Halloween Half Marathon (my favorite holiday)

Wearing Costumes=FUN!!

Letting go of my self doubt for one morning

Beautiful Leaves in Yellow, Orange and Red surrounding me

Waterfalls

Crisp Fall Air, but not too cold

THE coolest Race Shirt I have received

THE coolest Finishers Medal I have EVER SEEN

A new p/r....... 2:21:30

What a Beautiful Day!!

My Lucky Number 13

2010-09-20T10:53:00.004-06:00

Gabe and I have been married for 13 years today.

I can not believe I was lucky enough to find my soul mate at the age of 16.

Marry him when I was 21.

And know that we will share our whole lives together,

because I am as much in love with him today,

as I have ever been in our 18 1/2 years of knowing each other.

SEATTLE

2010-09-20T06:38:00.028-06:00

Seattle Trip-June 2010

I can not believe how far behind I am in update our family blog!! I am ashamed that our amazing journeys have not been documented as they happened. The summer was crazy busy, and not one single weekend went by that we didn't have something happening, I dare even say that most days were at least busy planning upcoming events. I feel it is important to do a re-cap of the main summertime happenings. The problem is, that things are going to be all over the place....different memory cards hold different images from different cameras, so it is going to be a lot of back and forth until I can get my crap together and stay current....so forgive me in advance so for being a flake!!.....

Our ride to the airport. Spencer picked us up in his Father's van. In the big van, there was only one row of seats, which we squished 4 of us on, and I sat on the floor with all the luggage. It made me laugh on the way, bouncing around all over, Noah freaking out I was going to die.

Once in Seattle, we met up with my Uncle Mike and Nikki, and decided that we wanted to take the ferry over to Bainbridge Island and have dinner there, then ride it back at night to see the city lights. I LOVE ferry rides. The only other time the kids have been on a ferry was in Virginia, and they could not even tell we were on the water because it was so dark, that we just stayed in the car. This time we walked onto it so we just just walk around and explore the island on foot.

Oops! This picture didn't make it in the editing process. Just tilt your head. You will get the idea. Z and I.....I wonder how much longer until I can not hold him on my shoulders anymore?? Sad, sad thought. :(

Addie, Nikki and I.

My Girls.....

Zane, Gabe and Noah

My Boys....

A view of the Space Needle from the Ferry.

The sun setting through the clouds. I believe sunsets are one of the most amazing sights to witness.....no matter where they are.

Fun story for you.....

So Uncle Mike tells us the ferry goes every 2o minutes until midnight. Sounded like a lot to me, but I am not one to question Uncle Mike. He is a smarty pants and carries a schedule around with him wherever we go. Nerd.

We get to the island, walk around for a bit trying to finding a 'Family Friendly' restaurant (dang kids!) Well, it seems like the entire island closes up at like 8:00. No where to really eat. We find a little coffee shop sit and have a snack and decide to head back to the city and have dinner since it is getting dark. We are on our way to the ferry, when we see we missed it by 3 minutes. It is still there, but they have closed everything up and will not let us on. Oh well, we can wait 20 minutes for the next one, no biggie, right Uncle Mike?? WRONG!! The next and final ferry for the night leaves at 11:45, which has us hanging around the ferry station for nearly 2 hours. We have hungry grumpy kids with nothing to do. I remembered there was a little grocery store about a mile away, so I walk down there and find that it is still open for another half hour. Thank God!! I buy some bread, lunch meat, cheese, crackers, yogurts and juice and haul it back to the ferry station, where I proceeded to open up my own little subway shop preparing sandwiches for everyone to get the grumblings out of their poor tummies. Funny what you can create from snagging plastic forks and condiments from a closed down deli. It was an adventure to say the least!

It was freezing and so late....but well worth the sights of the city at night. We didn't end up getting back to the hotel until after 2:00 in the morning, but luckily we are on vacation!

The next day we explored the city after picking up Gabe's race packet for the marathon. Of course we hit Pike's Place, which was a joke and I am sad we didn't hang out there longer, but the 2 cruise ships that unloaded that afternoon made it unbearable to enjoy.

We had a brilliant idea of walking to the Space Needle. I really enjoy walking around and exploring cities on foot. But, we have Mr. Noah, and he has a very hard time after a long period of walking up hills and long distances. I felt so bad that we completely wore him out. There were times he was holding himself up against buildings and lagging behind. He of course did not want to take a break and seem different than anyone else, so I stayed back with him and told him he was doing me a favor by staying back with me to keep me company. I hate those little reminders, that it is his HEART not his SPIRIT that can not keep going sometimes. After we spend time recovering and re hydrating, we took a cab back to Pikes Place to eat some lunch.

Vies from the top.

My Dad displaying his usual camera face....

Gabe with the city behind him.....

My boys playing and climbing...(of course)

Our 3 Ring Circus....

THE MARATHON!!
Seattle Rock 'n' Roll Marathon

2010
Number #12 for Gabe

Never forget your camera and rely on the 17 year old daughter to take your family photos. We have more pictures of random strangers with funny mustaches and silly signs than we do of our trip. I brought Gabe some Gatorade while walking up a hill with him at mile 22.

Crap, mile 22....can you imagine?? YIKES!!

I was so worried we were not going to see him at the finish line. We parked by the Space Needle, which doesn't seem far from Q-West Field, but I can assure you when you are walking it and trying to get there at a specific time, it is dang far! We made it, within minutes of Gabe passing the finish. Uncle Marc and Aunt Becky were in town from Oregon, and they were also at the finish line to see Gabe. Sorry, no picture of them....

Addie was in charge of the camera, remember?!?!?!

We did get to have dinner with them later and meet their daughter-in-law Shauna and ADORABLE Granddaughter Matilda. I wish I had a picture of her to show you. Her eyes alone were so amazing, she is just a completely adorable little girl, and you can tell makes everyone around her happy.

The following day we decided to take it easy. Wanted to see the Troll under the Bridge. I guess we didn't realize how many people would be there that morning, but it was packed! There were these 2 girls there that were posing like they were models all over the bridge, and getting annoyed with everyone and their children when they were in the way. So of course, when we found the opportunity to copy their silly poses, we did!!

On our final day before we left, we went to see the grave of Jimi Hendrix.

It was a beautiful monument.

A very touching tribute to an amazing artist.

Afterwards, we just hung out around the sea side waiting before we had to catch our flights.
Gabe took the camera and was being silly trying to take some of the typical pictures Addie and all her friends always do. The camera up in the air, making silly faces.

I think he is getting very good at it!

This AMAZING shot of Mt. Raineer was taken from the airplane as we flew home. It was the perfect way to say goodbye to Seattle and promise to be back as soon as we could! Over all the trip was fantastic, and we are looking forward to our next family get away to Moab this Fall...then, KAUAI next summer for Addies Senior trip!

Kindergarten Orientation for the Little Guy

2010-07-05T14:24:00.018-06:00

Guess who is leaving his Mama and going to Kindergarten? Sad, sad day. Zane could not be more excited, and when it came time for orientation, he could not wait to tour his new school and get the chance to feel like a 'big kid'.

After the orientation, the children all got to pick out a Crayon Sugar Cookie before we walked around the school. Z-Man grabbed a blue one, and showed that thing who was boss in a matter of minutes. Kinda made me want to go back to Kindergarten. Cookies, Field Trips, Naps...are you kidding me?

We began the tour, and of course, he held tight to his Daddy.

Yes, I am 'One of those Moms' that will even take a picture of someone

taking a picture of their child.
(Dimple City....can you see them??)

The door to his classroom, and the beginning of all new adventures

for the last of the Griffith clan.

He was very interested in everything the class had to offer.

Brightly colored curtains, a puppet stage, play place and even....

Dinosaurs!

Look at that little guy...I can not believe it has come to this.

He is going to Kindergarten in just a few short months

and I am left with all 3 of my kids in school.

*Sigh*

They handed out Bags at the end, and we made him wait until we were back home

before he tore into it.

He couldn't wait to see what the bright blue bag of mystery contained.

Everything he needs to get ready over the summer.

Is there a support group for Mommy's who have their babies going to school?

I hope so, cuz imma gonna need it!

Drive-By Truckers, Bacon Cupcakes and another Half Marathon

2010-07-02T09:53:00.025-06:00

I have a lot of catching up to do, so I figure I am going to take advantage of our long weekend, and get caught up on some blogging.

In May, Gabe and I took a trip together to follow one of favorite bands, The Drive-By Truckers. I registered us to run a Half Marathon on the day we were leaving, because...

HEY, there was one, so why not?? :)

Patterson Hood did an in-store appearance at The Heavy Metal shop right before the Salt Lake show. It was so awesome to see him up close and that personal, it was pretty kick-ass.

One of the songs he played was 'Heathens' which is ONE of my favorite songs he wrote.

The show in Salt Lake was dang awesome. They did stop twice to throw a few idiots out that were getting a little too rough...how would that be? To get thrown out of a show because your a jerk, and the guys you came to see are the ones who eighty-sixed you? Nice!

The next morning Gabe and I hopped on a plane and headed to Colorado to see them for the next two shows. Next stop......Boulder.

In the endless research I do before going out of town, I discovered a little bakery that has....are you ready for this? MAPLE BACON CUPCAKES!!! Are you drooling yet? Can you imagine? I have had bacon chocolate, delish, and I made Maple Bacon Chocolate Chip cookies for Christmas, delish......so I was more than intrigued to get to have my favorite salty treat top off my all time favorite confection, the beautiful perfect cupcake. My only regret is that I was not wearing my t-shirt that says, 'You had me at Bacon'

Look at that! It was perfect! The thick, rich ganoche with scattered bits of saltiness was more than I could take, it was that good. The cupcake part was good too, but to be honest, I could have eaten the frosting with bacon on it all. day. long.

My first experience with having a latte with a cute design...mostly because I get my coffee black, and to-go. It was actually Gabe's coffee, but I pretended it was made just for me.

Look at that!! Are you kidding me!!

No one believed I would actually eat the cupcake, as I have banned all sugary treats from my body for nearly a year....with the exception of half a bacon cookie at Christmas, but I proved them wrong! Here is the proof! I only ate 1/4 of the delightful treat, but I wanted to devour a dozen...it is called restraint, I had to practice it big time.

After we left the shop, we walked around the corner to where the concert was that night and BAM!! TOUR BUS!! Sweet!

The Boulder show was by far my favorite of the three we saw them at. The venue was so awesome, the band was into the whole night like you wouldn't believe, and the crowd was fantastic. For the final encore, they called their opening band on stage with them, and they played, 'Rocking in the Free World' by Neil Young. It was simply amazing.

Next stop....Fort Collins. There was not too much for me to say about this city, we only showed up for the show, then headed back to Boulder. I loved Boulder, what a great town. It was the last night of seeing them, so it was sad it had come to an end, but they were worth every minute of the stress and planning we went through to make this trip happen.

On Saturday we drove into Denver where we stayed for our final night before flying home on Sunday afternoon. Well, we had one last thing to do before we went back home.

A Half Marathon....

Here is the view of the park at the starting line. It was a chilly morning, but absolutely beautiful. I was not sure how I was even going to do. I wanted to go faster than the Salt Lake Half that I did in April, but I was really sick the night before, and was severely dehydrated. I was not optimistic at all. I had a really rough start, in fact, I started downing Gatorade during the race because I was very dizzy and seeing fuzzy. Not good. At mile 6, I came around and started feeling good. How odd is that, it took me 6 miles to feel better about my race. I think my body recovered from being depleted of nutrition from the night before. Well, we made it. Gabe by my side as always, encouraging me to do the best I can. He is simply the best.

Here is a picture of the post-race lunch they fed us. Out of the above items, I only ate the tomatoes. I am still weird about eating any food that I don't make. I know, what a freak.

Ahhhh.....we love each other

I believe we finished in 2:29....so I beat my last time by just a few minutes,

but I will take it....all things considered.

One of my favorite things about finishing a race, is the 'trick or treating' that takes place after. They filled us up with lots of goodies to take home and try.

Four days later, four hours after the race, we were on a plane headed back home.

The time flew by, as it always does when we finally get to have some time alone,

but we made the most out of every minute we had together.

13.1 Miles Broken Down.....come run with me!!

2010-04-19T12:20:00.045-06:00

Here is my List. My Inspiration.

The Reasons I Ran. The Reasons I Kept Going for 13.1 Miles.

Years ago, I read an article about Kristin Armstrong (Lance Armstrong's ex-wife) running her first marathon. She said she made a list and dedicated every mile to someone or something to keep her motivated. I loved the idea of this, and I always swore if I took on a monstrous physical task, I would do that. So I did. I will break it down for you.

This is at about the half way mark. The first time I got to see my family cheering me on. It was emotional turning the corner on Highland Drive knowing they were waiting for me. I wanted to hug them and tell them how much I loved them all.

I felt pretty good at this point, even though my legs were a little crampy after waiting 10 minutes in a line at Beans and Brews buying water because the last aid station had ran out of cups, and using their bathroom because the porta potty lines were insane! Thank God Gabe brought $20.00 with us for emergencies!

The cute little cheerleaders Ash and Zane waiting for us.

The kids watching, waiting to see us.

Adison and Tyler with their signs....

Finally, I saw them and made my rounds giving sweaty hugs and salty kisses.

Here is the breakdown of my 'Reasons to Run' list....ALL 13 of them!

MILE # 1 ADISON

(This is her 13 year old picture)

Many of the miles correlate to a certain number. Adison was my first born. Her birth was the point in life where I knew life would never be the same. We have gone through so much in her 17 years, and I reflected on all the good she does, and the future ahead. She has some amazing goals and I know she will achieve everyone of them. I am both scared for her and proud of her for every day. I love her very much, and only want the best for her in everything.

MILE #2 MY MOM

A few years ago, we had a major health scare with my Mom involving a spider bite and finding out she had Type II Diabetes. This June I will be riding my bike for the second time in the Tour de Cure and raising money for the American Diabetes Association.

MILE #3 THE 3 RING CIRCUS

My reasons for living. These three critters combined are what motivates me to give them the best life I can. Gabe and I can not believe how lucky we are to have three children that are so completely amazing in every way. By having them so many years apart, we have had a chance to enjoy them so much more at every age, and appreciate their similarities and celebrate their differences. We are truly blessed.

MILE #4 FAMILY

Too many pictures to post here! I really focused on how fortunate I am to have the family I do. We have a lot of family close by, a lot more family far away, but we think about them all the time and hope they are happy and healthy. It is hard having so many people you care about live so far away. Time just flies on by, and before you realize it, it has been years since you have seen them, and it just doesn't seem fair. We always try to focus on the great times we have together, and look forward to the future visits with those far away. We feel very fortunate to have our children surrounded by so much love from Grandparents and Aunts and Uncles close by. We are all very lucky!

MILE #5 ZANE (a.k.a. Z-MAN)

(These are his 9 month old pictures)

Z-Man, our 5 year old!!! This kid, ahhh, this kid is just so much fun. Is it because he is our last, so everything he does seems so damn adorable?? I have no idea, but whatever it is, he can do no wrong. Just don't ask his bother and sister the same question ;) When I was just moments from the finish line we saw him waiting for us, and he looked at me and yelled, "Mommy, I need to go to the bathroom!" I promised him I would take him as soon as I was done running. Too cute. Gabe and I really wanted to have one more child after Noah, but we went back and forth because the chances of having another child with a heart defect increased. We both knew we would face whatever challenges came along if it were going to happen, but we were lucky, and he is healthy, and our family is now complete.

MILE #6 FRIENDS

Again, too many pictures to post here. Friends. Where do you even begin to put into words what friends do for you?? I have such a variety of friends.

Friends I have had since I was a kid.

People I haven't seen in a long time,

but know we always pick up right where we left off when we see each other.

New friends whom I already adore more than I can say

Friends I have reconnected with (thank you facebook)

People I see almost every day

People I consider my family

People who have been by my side during the worst times, and the best times

MILE #7 CANCER

The Salt Lake Marathon was organized to raise money for the Huntsman Cancer Institute. Gabe and I personally know 7 people who have or have had Cancer. They very in all degrees and seriousness, but we are happy to say every one of them is either recovering, or doing better than expected with treatment. Two Dads (both Gabe's and mine), Uncles (Marc and Marv), my friend Jenny, her mother Cathy, our friend Mike Reagan, who has beat the big C twice! Take that cancer.

MILE 8- AUNT DEBBY

It has been two years since Aunt Debby passed away. I still feel like I am in shock with the whole thing. It doesn't seem real to lose someone so young and healthy unexpectedly. Number 8 was her favorite number, as it symbolizes Infinity, and she always loved that. She loved children so much and had an amazing bond with Noah. She kept him so healthy before he had his last 'open heart surgery' and was the only one he would allow to see him after his last 'heart operation' I was kicked out of the hospital room by him, but she was allowed in...of course she was holding a nice colorful lollipop, but even with out it, I am sure he would have allowed her in because he loved her so much. Our family will never be the same without her, and her absence is always felt like a sting right to the chest. I love you Aunt Debby.

MILE #9 ORGAN DONATION

If you aren't already, become an organ donor.

Here is the link, follow it and sign up.

http://www.donatelife.net/

Did you know you can save 9 lives by becoming an organ donor. It is a Gift of Life that I have witnessed first hand. People who have been given that second chance at life, and people who never got another chance because they ran out of time waiting for a transplant.

Please seriously consider it.

MILE #10- HOPE

Last year at the Donate Life 9k, I was talking to my friend Carolyn about wanting to run the Half Marathon in Salt Lake. She said it is the 10 year anniversary of her daughter Hope's birth right around then, and a light clicked on. What if I run in her honor? What better way to push myself, and maybe raise a little money if I put an important meaning behind it.

I never had the pleasure of meeting Hope. She passed away at 4 1/2 months from complications of having a severe Congenital Heart Defect. Our families have both been effected by Congenital Heart Disease, and we know each other because of our special heart kids. I can tell you, as much as I pushed myself to achieve this goal, I felt her pushing me even further, and doing this for a cause much more important than myself. I thought of her, and the family she left behind for miles and miles of training runs...and Mile 10 was hers at the race.

The images are the shirts I made and Gabe and I wore to the race. The fronts had the HOPE logo I made on it, and the backs had the following information. Gabe came up with, 'Running with HOPE in our HEARTS' after we left an IHH charity fundraiser, and it has been our 'theme' since that day.

MILE #11 NOAH

My favorite number 11, my favorite 11 year old....Noah. I talk about Noah and the fears I always have for him all the time. Having an ultrasound done by a cardiologist who basically verifies your worst fears will forever change your life. I can not explain the sorrow and fear I lived in just through that first year. I have witnessed his little body in a medical state that still gives me nightmares. I have held a pure blue child while he laughed and giggled like nothing was wrong. I have ridden in an ambulance and gave him over to surgeons whom I trusted would do their best to get him back to those loving arms as soon as possible.

So much time goes on where he is just a normal 11 year old, but it is still always on our minds that life is sacred. After our race on Saturday, he begged us to let him do the 5k next year. I don't want him to....at all, but I haven't told him that. I keep thinking, well maybe if we walk. Then we went to the Zoo the next day, and he was having a hard time after a few hours and we had to get him rehydrated and rested. Those are the reminders that I hate. That he is different, but I will do what I can to make him happy.

MILE #12- GABRIEL

Wow. How lucky am I to have him?? Gabe and I have been married 12 years, and we have been through so much together. We met at the age of 16, and I did good by trapping him early (sucka)...it was the keeping him part that wasn't so easy.....I kid, I kid.

Gabe is such an inspiration to me. I watched him run his first marathon 6 years ago. I had tears in my eyes as I watched him finish in complete disbelief that anyone could do that. I have since cheered him on while he ran 10 more. This June I will be his biggest cheerleader as he runs his 12th marathon in Seattle. He stayed with me during the entire race and never left. He made me drink water when I didn't want to, slow down when he thought I was going too fast, and held my hand as we finished the Half Marathon side by side. He is my soul mate, and I can not wait for all the adventures life has in store for us.

MILE #13- ME

I saved the last mile for myself. Putting myself last is what I always do, with no regrets. But guess, what? It was the longest mile (1.1)....so I made myself take that time to accept a lot of things about myself. It is hard to accomplish what I have, and it feels arrogant even talking about it, but I am writing it, because it has been my journey for the last year....well, more like my whole life, but it really started a year ago.

Last year I ran my first 5k. I will not tell you what I weighed, but I will tell you it was ridiculous, and I needed to put all my focus on losing weight so I could finally be the person I want to be. I wanted to be the person running the race, NOT the cheerleader on the sidelines. Being a healthy active person was my only goal, and one year later, I will tell you I am as close as I have ever been. I will continue the journey of finding myself, and giving myself permission to be the person I have been hiding all these years.

I finished the Half Marathon and felt incredible.

It took me

2:31:39

Which is a pace of

11:34 per mile

I told everyone my goal was to finish, and I was not lying. I finished this race, and I am already registered to run a Half Marathon in Denver next month. I am registered for 3 bike tours from May to June of this year, and I can not WAIT to cross the finish line of each one of them.

I am ready to start believing in myself, because now I have PROOF that I can do it.

Because I did do it, and I will do it

again, and again, and again....

Thoughts Before Race Day

2010-04-16T10:22:00.008-06:00

My mind is racing.

I have spent months training with this one goal in mind. Hell, I have had this goal since last October, but didn't start following a training plan until February. I have pushed myself through runs I never thought I could do. I will never forget the first time I ran 5 miles. I thought to myself when I was done, "There is NO WAY I can do a Half Marathon" That run took everything out of me. If it weren't for Gabe running by my side, encouraging me, pushing me, and most of all, BELIEVING in me, I don't know if I would have kept going. I tried to focus on why I set out to run in the first place. I wanted to accomplish something so huge for myself, but also run for a cause. If I could push myself everyday for a REASON, I knew I would find it in me to do this. I talked with family and friends about making donations to our Heart Group, Intermountain Healing Hearts if I ran this. I have raised money for a cause so close to my own heart, and I am running in memory of a little girl I never met, that would have been 10 years old this month. The image of her, and the HOPE she has given so many has been on my mind mile after mile, and I kept running. Before I knew it, I had run 8, 9, 10, even 12 miles!!..

"Who is this person?" I kept asking myself.

The answer was clear.

The person I always wanted to be........

correction,

the person I always knew I was,

but never gave her a chance to accomplish her goals

because I let self-doubt take over.

I am ready to let that person go. I want more than anything to live each day believing there is NOTHING I can not do. If I can tell my family, kids, husband and friends that they are awesome and CAN DO anything in life, why can't I believe that for myself? I am going to, because I deserve that. I deserve to see the Heather everyone else can see. So today, I will focus on how far I have come, and even more, how far I am going to go.

I have posted the course map. If anyone is in the area and want to cheer me on, I appreciate it more than I can say. Even if you can not do that, send good vibes my way, because the love and support of my family and friends pushes me to do my best at anything I take on.

See you tomorrow.....13.1 miles later.

17 years ago, our lives forever changed

2010-04-02T16:46:00.007-06:00

First off, Happy Birthday Goonie.

Our beautiful, perfect Ady2ude turned 17 today.

Where does the time go?

I am not sure if most people know, but I was only 17 years old when Adison was born. It was a scary, uncertain time in life. What 17 year old is honestly ready to take on the challenges of raising a child? I can tell you without a doubt, having her was the best thing that ever happened to me. She was not planned, and it is not something I ever hope she goes through herself, but she taught me that life is so worth living, and if you give yourself to someone heart and soul, they will always be with you. There is nothing I would not do for her, then or now. I grew up when I had her, in fact, we grew up together, and she truly was a gift I still do not believe I deserve.

She has grown up so much in the past year, it is unbelievable. I am facing the fact that our time together with her as a child is getting smaller and smaller. She is driving her own car, has a job, looking at college, and is an amazing daughter and sister. I keep looking at it like an hourglass, the sand drops slowly, but when it nears the end, it speeds up and you begin questioning life in the terms if you did enough with the time we had together. I know she will ALWAYS be in our lives, but as a child, it is starting to come to an end. The only thing making the sting a little easier, is the fact that she is so AMAZING, and I know she has so many things to offer this world.

Happy Birthday Goonie Girl,

we could not be more proud to call you our daughter!

11 is my favorite number, and Guess who just turned 11..??

2010-03-30T10:02:00.012-06:00

This guy right here!!

Noah turned 11 years old today, and let me tell you,

it has been a crazy adventure filled year with this kiddo.

Take a little journey with me as I re-cap a few highlights of his last year.

Heart Camp. Meeting new friends that are fellow kids who have, or have a family member who has been diagnosed with CHD. Noah had a great time doing what he does best....being a crazy kid!

Heart Walk. A big group of friends came together to spend he day with us as we celebrated our Heart Hero Noah and raised money for an important cause. I know he is young and may not always know the degree of what it means to have survived what he has, but I can assure you, the love and support that surrounds him is always felt.

Becoming a 5th grader!! He loves his teacher this year, and I can not believe how grown up he is. He is turning into a little man right before our eyes.

Medical scares. I do not have pictures of the choking incident that caused him to stop eating for 3 weeks and lose 11 pounds, or the severe concussion that landed us in the triage room at Primary Children's Emergency Room, but I do have documentation of his last echo cardiogram he had at his annual Cardiologist appointment. During this visit, we discovered he has an irregular heart rhythm, which led to sinking feelings in our stomachs as we had further tests done to decide what level of treatment was next, including the possibility of surgery to have a pacemaker installed.

We decided he looked like Iron Man with his Halter Monitor on, so that has become his new nickname. The test had to be done two times, but it has been determined that it has not yet reached the level of treatment needed that requires surgery, but that is something we will be facing in the future. We will not think about that for now, just feel lucky to have an amazing fighter with us and take life one step at a time.

See....Iron Man!!

Besides being an adventurous kid, he is a wonderful Big Brother,

and a great example for Zane to look up to.

He is very protective and loving with Z Man....well MOST of the time.

We could not love this crazy kid more than we do.

In January, after 2 years of practice, testing and determination,

Noah became a 1st degree black belt.

Look at that board break....Now that is an amazing kid!!

Happy Birthday to you Noah.

We will always remember the lesson of the importance of life you have shown all of us through your 11 amazing years, and we always know how lucky we are to have such and amazing fighter who we could not be more proud of.

Celebrating Life

2010-02-16T11:12:00.007-07:00

I am hoping I can put into words the flood of emotion I had last night.

Gabe and I had planned on a special night with just Noah. We wanted to take him to a nice restaurant, and get him all dressed up, because the concert we were taking him to was a really big deal. Paul Cardall, a musician whom shares Noah's same heart defect, received a heart transplant last September. Last night, he had a concert at Abravanel Hall to 'Celebrate Life'. I was looking forward to this night for months, however, I did not prepare myself to experience all the emotions I did. When we arrived, they had a slide show playing, and Noah's beautiful face showed up. I didn't know they were going to have any of the CHD kids displayed, so that was a nice treat. They also had a poster set-up with kids from our heart group, Intermountain Healing Hearts, and again, his cute little face was displayed. I told him I felt like I should ask him for his autograph because he was so famous. The look on his face was priceless, he was beaming with happiness. We arrived there kind of late, so a few minutes after we stepped foot in the doors, we went to our seats to wait until the concert started. Gabe and I sat Noah in the middle of us, so we could both squeeze him throughout the show. There were a few song writers, that were friends of Paul's, that opened before he came onto stage. Noah kept asking when Paul was coming on, he was so excited. Finally he took the stage and everyone gave him a much deserved standing ovation before he even sat at the piano to play.

There were a lot of slide shows to watch which were set to his music. There was one in particular that really stood out to me. It was basically Paul's life from when he was listed for a heart transplant, until he received one and began to recover in the hospital. This is what the night was about. Celebrating a life long journey of a man and his family, and a scary time of waiting for a heart to become available, and then receiving a second chance at life. It also terrified me. Watching him as an adult, really made me think about what Noah's future might have in store. I don't allow myself to think that far ahead very often, but at that moment, I could not stop wondering. I really try to take every step as it comes, and know that he has done amazing with the repairs to his heart he has already received. Most of the time when I breakdown, it is reflecting back on his life, and all the ups and downs we have gone through. Last night I REALLY feared for the future. NOT that things can't be done, NOT that miracles haven't already occurred, and definitely NOT that he is unhealthy at the moment. It just hit me that I really NEVER allow myself to think so far ahead, which I believe is a good thing. I felt his loving embrace as he held his Mommy, because he could tell she needed to know he was okay. Without a word spoken, he told me that. I felt it was very ironic that the 10 year old was the one reassuring me everything is fine, and he is perfect.

Unfortunately we had to leave before the concert ended, because Gabe had to go into work. I took Noah to the lobby where he picked out a CD while Gabe pulled the truck around for us. Noah was thrilled about the whole night, and for a young child, he understood life at that moment on so many levels that even most adults are not able to comprehend.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2uEOymqt96g

Click on the link to watch the video of 100+ kids with CHD (Noah is at 6:55)

(I still can not figure out how to make the actual video show up on my blog. If you can share the secret of how it is done, I would be very happy!)

Santa's Breakfast 2009

2009-12-16T11:02:00.009-07:00

One of the many traditions we have is going to Santa's breakfast with Granny (Grandma Great). It is easily one of the most exciting ones for the kids. One year Gabe and I were out of town when he ran the Las Vegas marathon for the breakfast, but our kids didn't care, they were going no matter what! So my Mom took them that year, and it was sad to have missed it with them, because it is such a fun day for us.

This is what they asked for-

Zane- Sponge Bob Game

Noah- Lego's and $ 50.00 bucks

Adison- nothing..... (That is an easy one!)

My Uncle Mike took our family pictures for our Christmas cards while we were there,

and these are the two that made the cut.

How could you resist that cute smile on Zane....

Or the tongue sticking out on Adison??

I grabbed the camera and took a shot of Mike and Nikki.

I love this picture of them together.

Of course, the girls and I always need to be together,

so here we are with Santa

Outside in the freezing cold

Outside being the dorks that we are

Heel Clicks!!

I am going to go ahead and say MINE was the most amazing that day.

Heel clicking is one of my favorite things to do, and I am so impressed that I have come along way in my heel clicking abilities!

Kauai-Day 8, September 10th (Last Day)

2009-12-01T11:41:00.005-07:00

Kauai-Day 7, September 9th

2009-11-27T13:16:00.002-07:00

Noah's Cardiologist Appointment....or as I like to call it......He might need a WHAT!!!

2009-11-09T15:10:00.005-07:00

Life is full of up and downs, and with a child with CHD, the ride seems to be continuous.

Noah had his yearly cardiology appointment, which ALWAYS turns me into a ball of nerves for days preceding the actual appointment. Having to take your child to a cardiologist is one of those things that is hard to 'explain' to a parent of a healthy kiddo. It isn't somewhere you ever want to have to take your child, but it is our reality.

As usual, I had to keep convincing myself that everything was fine, he is fine, he has not been complaining about any of the symptoms that we are always watching out for. I told myself to relax, because it would be over soon, and they would tell us everything looked perfect...see ya next year. Everything was moving along smoothly....the echo went good. Really quick and they saw everything they needed to. We went to our room, and they came in to check his saturation levels. They were at 97% on room air....which is amazing for him. Good....one more thing out of the way. They hooked him up and did his EKG and we just waited for the Dr. to come in and tell us to get the heck out of there.

Well....that didn't happen. After all the good news that was making my butterflies disappear, we were hit with the fact that his EKG was not normal. So now we have him hooked up to a Halter monitor to see how his heart functions daily with his normal activity. If it looks good, the will use the results as a baseline for any future tests. If it is not normal, we will be having a discussion about having surgery to put in a pacemaker. This was NOT something I was prepared for, or something I even thought of as a possibility. A pacemaker, I know, is something some heart kids have. However, I thought that kids that were 'sick' had pacemakers, and I don't view Noah as sick, so I am worried. I am terrified, is more like it. I will focus on all the great news we received today...but I would be lying if I didn't admit that my brain is swelling with questions and fear.

I held it together really good while we were with Noah. We even teased him about looking like Iron Man with the Halter monitor on. But the second I was alone, the second I was out of his sight, I lost it. I had a 3 hour meltdown that I am trying to recover from. I am grateful for science, and the ability to intervene and correct something now if needed. But, I am a MOMMY, and I am scared, and worried, and full of love my little man who means the world to me.

Kauai-Day 6, September 8th

2009-11-06T16:22:00.004-07:00

Kauai-Day 5, September 7th

2009-11-05T14:52:00.005-07:00

Kauai-Day 4, September 6th

2009-11-03T14:28:00.006-07:00

Marathon Day

After Kim and I dropped Gabe off at the marathon start line, we drove to a spot where there was a turn about, so we would be able to cheer him on at miles 9 and 18. We parked in front of some guys yard and waited. Kim took a nap, and I read until we started to see runners coming. I couldn't believe the amount of spectators...just coming out to support the runners. We met some amazing people while waiting, all of which turned into a 'Go Gabe Go' cheering squad. You know why everyone is so nice in Kauai?? Because they live in Kauai...

We saw Dean Karnazes...'Ultra Marathon Runner' go by, so we snapped a shot.

Here comes Mr. Perfect....he is completely soaked. It rained more than half the race. He had a sponge he would use to soak up all the wetness from rain and sweat.

Some dumb ass lady drove her car down through the finish line! Luckily no one was hurt, but it was ridiculous that she did it. Several runners were in danger of being hit, and even had to go off course so they could finish safely.

Here is Gabe about 50 yards from the finish line. HE DID IT!!

That my friends is what you call a bloody nipple.

It sounds like a cocktail, but it is actually the result of so much moisture from running in the rain, and his nipple band aids wouldn't even stay on.

Later after we repaired the damage one!

(I'm sure he is going to love me for posting that picture)

After we got back from the run, we cleaned up, had lunch and took off for some sightseeing that required a lot of driving. We didn't want Gabe to cramp up in the water.

Our first stop was Glass Beach.

It is an area where glass from the dump washes up onto shore and has transformed into these amazing pebble looking objects.

Funny Sign at the Beach

Spencer found some glass that looked like pointy teeth, so of course he had to act like a goofball. We love him for it.

All the glass is in the sand. It makes the whole beach kind of glisten.

Gabe and I chillin' at the beach.

After Glass Beach we stopped for Shave Ice before heading to Waimea Canyon.

Gabe had been waiting to try this island treat from the moment we got there.

I guess running 26.2 miles a few hours before entitles you to a treat.

I guess.

There should be pictures of Waimea Canyon here, but my camera battery died, and Spencer has all the pictures. When he gets me a copy of them, I will have to add them to another blog entry.

Kauai-Day 3, September 5th

2009-11-02T13:30:00.004-07:00

Boy do we look rough!! We woke up early to watch the sunrise on our 3rd day. We had only been asleep for a few hours, but we dragged our lazy butts down to the beach in hopes of an awesome sight.
Gabe doesn't like his picture taken so much when he is sleepy.....but I had to get a picture of my cutie pie while we waited.

I left our mark in the sand while we waited. It was a trip for our 12th wedding anniversary, so it had to be done.

We were not very optimistic about getting to see the sun at all with all those dang clouds hanging out on the horizon. We waited and waited, and decided....no such luck!

I decided to at least capture a picture of the awesome sky up above, so I could say I witnessed some type of sunrise. Now...most people would get up early every morning trying to grab a glimpse of the sunset until they finally got to see it......not us. Sleep was more important, so we never attempted again.

After getting ready for the day, we headed down do Po'ipu beach. Gabe needed to pick up his packet registration for the marathon. While there, we met Dean Karnazes..'Ultra Marathon Runner'. In my opinion, crazy bastard, but whatever. Gabe was excited to meet him, as he really gets into his books and finds inspiration to keep going after reading of this mans amazing endurance and strength.

Gabe with Dean Karnazes

After picking up his race materials, we took a map of the course and decided to drive it so Gabe could get a sneak peak of the next days race. Oh God! It did nothing more than terrify me, as I have never seen him run a marathon with so many hills. And not just hills, endless uphill climbs for miles with no breaks. I was very nervous, and also so proud of him, because at this point, I would have thrown in the towel. Not my man though, he was stoked for the experience.

On our way back, we drove through the tunnel of trees. Let me assure you that no pictures could do this justice. You are driving forever through this amazing....well...tree tunnel, and it just just insane. I wanted to play tarzan and swing from vine to vine the whole way down.

We met up with the Fenwicks and played for the rest of the day at Po'ipu beach. There was another huge sea turtle here, so it was fun to see them again. This is where Kim really let herself go and took really well to snorkeling. She was in the ocean forever! She found her comfort zone and didn't ever want to leave. I was so happy for her, she conquered her fears and had an amazing time. Gabe and I left a little early to grab groceries for the pasta dinner I made for all of us the night before the marathon.

We ended the night like we always did, with a few glasses of wine in the hot tub. It was a great day. We had to get to bed early.....because we had to wake up at 4:00 a.m. to leave the hotel and head to the start line for the marathon. YIKES!!

Kauai-Day 2, September 4th

2009-10-28T10:06:00.012-06:00

Look closely and you will see the Sea Turtle. Isn't he so cute!

He is so perfect.

Okay, my original plan was to blog each day after we got back from our trip. Well, here I am like 6 weeks later and I am just getting to day 2. Oh well, such is my life.

Our second day in Kauai we headed up to he north shore and played at Tunnels Beach. This was by far my favorite beach day. Within minutes of snorkeling in the ocean, I was surrounded by SEA TURTLES! I have never seen them before in all the times I have been in the ocean, so I pretty much freaked at the sight of them. It made my day. Not like anything could have ruined my day in paradise, but it was so memorable.

Spencer and Chandra were getting to dive right into the glorious magic that awaited in the sea. Kim was a little more reluctant to snorkel because she is afraid of water. She took baby steps though, easing herself in and getting a little more comfortable. I think she did great considering it was her first time in the ocean to snorkel, and being nervous to even try.

Here is where my blogging skills really show. I meant to put these pictures down below this post with the other pictures they relate to, but I suck. When Kim and I were at Queens Bath, we lost track of Gabe, Spencer and Chandra. We came across this sign. Oh my, I hope they didn't jump in the crashing waves!

Kim added 3 more marks to the plaque...just in case they were goners. We found them, and the marks dried up, so there was no evidence of our concerns.

Queens Bath where there were dozens of huge Sea Turtles.

Tunnels Beach

The view was amazing

The whole gang...minus myself (I of course was taking the picture)
Chandra, Kim, Gabe and Spencer

Gabe and I on the beach

Kim getting ready to test the waters

It was windy and humid...which doesn't make for the prettiest pictures

But who cares...we were in paradise.

Gabe playing like a little boy in the water

Did I mention I have a crush on him?

Isn't he perfect? :)

After playing at the beach, we drove to a spot called Queens Bath (above mentioned).

On our way down to the shore, we took some pictures by a waterfall.

Spencer was being goofy as usual...we couldn't expect or want anything less.

Gabe and I

Spencer and Chandra...a little blurry.

I think they were drinking.

My Kimmie, my cupcake, my forever friend.

There were dozens of Sea Turtles just playing in the crashing waves.

I like to think it was their source of fun, like they were at an amusement park or something on some wild ride.

View of Queens Bath

Gabe snapped pictures of Kim and I as we headed back to the Condo.

We always went in the back way because we only had the condo for 2 people, not 3.

This is how Kim earned the nickname DLS for our trip

She was our 'Dirty Little Secret'

Noah's trip to the E.R.

2009-10-06T13:00:00.003-06:00

UEA weekend is suppose to be a time for vacation, or relaxation. Well, since we are broke, we decided to stay home and just take it easy. Gabe and Noah were playing video games Friday, when an accident occurred. So much for rest and relaxation!

Noah tried getting on my bed while playing xbox and fell smacking his head against the foot board. He actually BROKE the foot board with his coconut. Gabe asked me to call the Dr. to see if we should bring him. While I was on the phone, Gabe decided we are taking him NOW! Noah could not see the bottom part of Gabe's face, and he said he felt 'blacky'. We assumed that meant he was going to pass out. I left work and headed to Primary Children's to meet them there. Luckily Nikki had stopped by the office to see me, so she drove me up there. What a sick feeling....trying to reach your hurt child and not knowing what is happening. I arrived at the hospital before Gabe, so I checked Noah in so everything moved along faster. I went outside to wait for his car to pull up. Pacing back and forth...I just lost it. The 'what if's' were circling through my head and I could not stop thinking. When Gabe's truck finally arrived at the emergency drop-off....I lost it even more. Gabe mouthed 'calm down...it is OK' to me through the window. I whipped the truck door open and saw Noah there trying to calm ME down. He said he could see better and his head just hurt. I walked him into the E.R. while Gabe parked the truck and let them know he was there. He had his vitals checked, explained what happened and we took a seat waiting for a room to open. Out of nowhere, Noah grabbed on to me, screamed that his head hurt and he broke out in a cold sweat. I helped him to the bathroom to splash some cold water on his face. As soon as we opened the door, he collapsed to the floor, and went out of it. I opened the door and told them someone needed to come help him. I picked him up and brought him back to the waiting room, where he began vomiting and losing it again. They sat him in a wheelchair and rushed him to the Trauma Room. I myself, began to lose it. There has only been one other time we had been in that room, and it was when Noah went into heart failure at 6 weeks old. I felt like someone had punched me in the gut and removed my soul. Watching him out of consciousness on the bed, then vomiting, then going out of it again scared me to death. As much as we have been through with him, I still could never get use to the fear of something really bad happening.

The Dr's. worked on him for awhile, then tried to reassure us that head traumas often result in lethargy and vomiting. They did not like his color though, and were worried about how out of it he was. They did a CT Scan....and we waited. The good news came that his the tests all looked normal. He was diagnosed with severe concussion. The Dr. said she did not like his color and how listless he still was, so she ordered him an i.v. with medicine to stop him from throwing up, restore his fluids and help with pain. They started the i.v., and Gabe and I just waited next to the hospital bed and worried. After about an hour, he began to talk and started to perk up. They gave him some Gatorade, which he was excited to drink if it meant he would be leaving sooner. He kept it down, and 5 1/2 hours later we were out of there, with clear instructions of what to watch for and to limit any activity he does for 2 weeks.

I am more than happy to say he is doing great. It took me 2 full days to recover from it. Gabe and I were exhausted from fear, but he has bounced back much quicker than either one of us.

Kauai-Day 1, September 3rd

2009-09-28T11:28:00.004-06:00

Paradise....pure paradise. Gabe and I decided a year and a half ago, that no matter what happens in life, we are going back to Kauai. We went for our honeymoon in 1997, and we have never done anything but dreamt about the day we would return. We had gone on other trips....Mayan Riveara and Cabo San Lucas for our anniversary, which were all amazing, but they were not Kauai. We found the perfect reason to go. The Kauai marathon was just a few weeks short of our 12th anniversary date, so we booked it! We asked our friends Kim, Spencer and Chandra to come with us. As soon as we arrived, life became less hectic, the stress was lifted, and I was in love....all over again!

The first day was mellow, we explored the areas around our hotel a little, hit the amazing pool they our hotel had and waited for our friends flights to come in and met them for dinner.

There are chickens everywhere! It is an amazing sight when you first get there, but after a few days, you barely notice them. We parked at a overlook to capture a picture of the beach and we were attacked by these little guys. The Mama jumped up on our car while her babies surrounded the car trapping us in. I had to get out of the car and lure them about 20 feet from the car then run back and take off. I didn't think we would ever get out of there!

We checked into our room, and was amazed at how lovely it was. A chefs kitchen, huge rooms, balconies, bathrooms.....all of it was just so nice. I was happy we decided to stay here.

Like I said, we didn't do too much the first day, but it was nice to take it easy after the long flight. It was also good to know we would have a good nights sleep, and wake up to paradise in the morning. Kim stayed with us, and Spencer and Chandra stayed in a hotel about a 1/4 of a mile down the road. I just kept saying to Gabe, "We are here, we came back!"

12 Amazing Years

2009-09-21T12:43:00.005-06:00

September 20, 2009

( because I am late )

Married for 12 years to someone who I look up to, admire and truely just worship is more than I can say I deserve. I can not imagine what I ever did in life to be lucky enough to have him here with me, but whatever it is..........thank you for letting him be mine.

Heart Walk 2009

2009-09-15T12:26:00.006-06:00

Our Heart Hero....Noah

On Saturday, September 12th, we attended the 2nd annual

Heart Walk for Intermountain Healing Hearts

It was a grueling 1 mile walk, which took us

22:57 to do. Can you believe that?

We may have tip toed the thing we went so slow.

Well, making a good time was not our goal,

showing up to support a wonderful cause with

people we love was our only purpose!

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!

After about 50 steps, there was a rest stop and snack station. Sheeew, I didn't think we would make it, but we did!! We learned that the snacks weren't suppose to be eaten until AFTER the walk.....silly us! Oh well, we didn't take anymore after the race, so I guess we can be forgiven.

Gabe was trying to motivate Jason to the finish line....

You can do it!!

As always, Ashlyn and Zane were being their usual selves

and taking off to be crazy little monkeys!

Noah and Tyler like to take it easy

Jason pushing a stroller with a McDonalds cup.

Gabe finally caught up to those crazy monkeys!

Addie and Zane refueling after a tough workout

The Griffith Family minus the man of the hour

our NOAH!!

He took off to play with some friends he had met

at the heart camp last month.

Our wonderful friends Alec, Jenny and Brian came to support this great cause with us.

Jason, Tyler and Ashlyn are always there supporting our family.

We were minus Carrie because she had a church activity.

I guess when the lord calls......you must obey.

Here we are....the whole gang.

We were missing my Uncle Mike and Nikki, because they slept in.

My Mom had a client meeting she could not get out of,

and I plain ol' forgot to tell my dad.

Ooooops!!

They did register though, so donations were made in their names.

Gabe and I with our miracle child.

Gabe is so proud of this little guy

Me and my little man

The 3 ring circus.

Gabe and I are so proud to be their parents.

We are so lucky to have each one of them.

Finally, a picture with all of us!

The purpose of the Heart walk was not only to raise money and awareness to a great cause, but to honor the heart angels that earned their wings through a courage battle with CHD.

It was very touching to see the beautiful posters

the families had put together to honor their child.

There is so much love and support in this group, each and every family

is amazing to have gone through the struggles that having a child with CHD brings.

Gabe and I have so many mixed feelings when it comes to this.

We were introduced to Intermountain Healing Hearts by a member that did not even know us, but stumbled across my blog one day.

I feel like it had to have happened for a reason.

Gabe and I can look at all these other families who have children effected by this, and realize we are not alone. It would have been so helpful to have when Noah was little, when hope was all we had to hold onto. We never knew anyone in our situation, so we never knew what to expect from another parents point of view. Now we have an amazing 10 years old boy that can serve as an example of what the future can hold to others....something we never had.
It is truly nothing short of an honor to belong to this organization, and we hope to be more involved in spreading awareness to this cause that will continue to be a part of our lives.

There was a beautiful ceremony at the end, where we had a moment of silence for the fallen angels, as well as others that are fighting in the hospital. We listened to musician Paul Cardell, who is an adult with CHD, in fact, shares Noah's exact heart condition,

whom received a heart transplant the Thursday before.

It was beyond touching as I stood their watching these parents who had lost a child release a butterfly in their honor. It was amazing to watch them fly up in the air, where they all kind of grouped together, then took off out of sight.

It was a moment I was honored to have witnessed.

If you look closely, you can see the butterflies.

Addie has a J-O-B

2009-08-28T10:47:00.008-06:00

See that darling little worker in the background?

That is my Goonie.

Gabe and I snuck into Famous Footwear after we dropped Addie off for work. We wanted to see her in action!

I grabbed my camera, and Gabe said, "No, No, what are doing with that?"

I said "I want to get documented proof of my girl workin'!"

Well, Gabe advised me NOT to do it, but he as well as everyone else should know that I would never pass up an opportunity to embarrass one of my kids!

So, I was hiding behind a pillar, watching her do her thang when I pulled out the Nikon and snapped a shot. DANG IT, I forgot to turn the flash off! The store lit up really bright, and Addies head looked up, she stares right at me and says, "OMG!!" Then she put her head back down and pretended nothing ever happened.

It was classic, classic I tell ya!

She did amuse me with one pose before telling me to get the heck out of there and take my stupid camera with me.

Gabe apologized, and led me out the door.

They are NO FUN!!

Back to School 2009 Edition

2009-08-26T10:42:00.009-06:00

Where did the summer go?

That is the question me and my kids have been asking over and over in the final days before school started back up again. I am amazed at how fast it goes, and here we are again, starting a new school year. Another reminder that my kiddos are getting bigger,

and Gabe and I are getting older.

I present to you....(drum roll please)......

Noah Spencer Griffith

5th Grader!!

School: Entheos Academy

Teacher: Mr. Kent

Shoe Size: 8 in men's (yes...you read that right!)

Wants to be when he grows up: Movie Director, Producer and Creator

(** note- Noah actually started school last Wednesday, but I thought since Addie started school today, I would combine the two of them)

I do not know how many eye rolls I get the morning of the first day of school,

but I assure you, it is a lot.

They seem so much older to me on the first day of school.

Even more so than the last day of summer break.

When I picked Noah up that day and listened to the excitement of him explaining his first day of school, I became overwhelmed with emotion. I felt so lucky to be sharing that moment in time with him. He is such a miracle, a fighter, and I feel honored to be his mother.

There is not a moment every single day that it crosses my mind how lucky we are to have Noah.

I feel like I always have to explain after saying something like that.....yes, I feel honored to be a mother, period. All three of my children are remarkable
and make me a better person everyday.

But there were moments in Noah's life where I dropped to my knees and begged, pleaded, screamed and cried to whatever greater power exists in this world to give him a chance.

Now...after that little rant.... I introduce to you.....(drum roll again)......

Adison Gabrielle Griffith

11th Grader!!

School: Copper Hills High School

Subject most looking forward to: Peer tutoring and ASL

Shoe Size: 9

Wants to be when she grows up: Special Ed Teacher,
specializing in Autism and Down Syndrome children
(what parent couldn't be proud of THAT!!)

Isn't she perfect? I just can not believe where the time has gone. She is just two years away from going to college, and I swear to god she was just born.

Her age also brings a lot of memories of her birth to light.
See, it was at the end of my Junior year in High School when Gabe and I had Adison.

Talk about a scary time in life.

Each one of my kids have taught an important lesson in life, and I hope one day, Addie will be able to understand how grateful I am for the lesson of pure love and selflessness she gave me.
There is so much I want for her future, becoming a young mother is not one of them.
But, for me, she must know, that I never truly knew what love was,
until the day she was born.

Wow, I am waaaay too emotional today....sorry about that!

Having your kids get older is such a bitter sweet ordeal.

But I am so grateful for the chance to call these

silly creatures 'My Kids'

Heart Camp 2009

2009-08-18T11:14:00.013-06:00

The first ever Heart Camp with Intermountain Healing Hearts

took place on Friday, August 14th-Saturday, August 15th.

It was held at Camp Wapiti up Settlement Canyon.

Intermountain Healing Hearts is a group of families effected by CHD

providing support and encouragement to each other.

I am honored to be a part of such an amazing organization.

The main lodge where we ate and the kids played many games.

I really thought the plaque outside the main lodge was very fitting to the occasion.

The pool I was afraid the kids would not get to use, but we had a break in the weather on Saturday and the kids were able to swim after all.

The committee prepared treats for the movie night.
They had nachos, ice cream, brownie sundaes and root beer floats.
They had a giant movie screen set up in the field were we all sat with our families and watched 'Escape to Witch Mountain'

This is a 'not so pretty' picture of me with Noah right after I helped the kids load their stuff into the cabin.....during a hail storm!!
I volunteered to take care of dinner on Friday, and lunch on Saturday.
It was so much fun to get to be a part of the camp.
I really need to thank my wonderful friends
who came out to help me:
Carrie
Spencer and Chandra
Melissa
you guys really are the best....thank you!!

The kids had a great time getting to know each other,

and playing outside getting ready for the festivities of the day.

We were assigned cabin #12. Zane was very sad we did not get cabin #11 because it had a picture of a dinosaur on the outside of it.

We had a lazy morning on Saturday.

It was gloomy outside and the beds inside were so much more inviting.

We finally dragged our lazy butts out of bed for a yummy breakfast of

pancakes, fruit and eggs.

We went from a dark sky filled with angry clouds

To THE most amazing sunset I have ever seen.

Intermountain Healing Hearts plans on making the camp a three or four day camp where we send Noah away to be with kids like him every summer. I feel so lucky to have found this group. I want Noah to always be aware of the fact that their are other kids who are like him, and that he can grow up having support as well as giving hope to others by his amazing progress.

5th Birthday's are for WILD THINGS

2009-08-14T11:08:00.022-06:00

5 years old already....where has the time gone? Our little Z man, our baby, is getting so big!!

We had an awesome party. We hired 'Wild Things' to come show us, teach us and let us feel the animals of Zane's choice. It was a great idea for a party, and I recommend it to anyone looking for a unique birthday experience!

Blue Tongued Lizard- Wali

Hedge Hog- Huff 'n' Puff

He liked to stay curled up when the kids were feeling him.

He also made a noise that sounded like a steaming kettle.

Sugar Glider- Bitty (soooooo cute!)

African Grey Parrot- Congo

He was such a sweet parrot.....he blessed us when we sneezed.

Pueblan Milk Snake- Harmless

The kids were really open to touching the snake

It felt like a cold steele pipe. It was really neat.

Chinchilla- Gizmo This was the softest thing I have EVER felt!

Rex Rabbit- Curly

The kids LOVED all the animals

After the animals left, we had a scavenger hunt!

The boys found the zebra hiding in the dog kennel.

Pinata Time!!

Noah and Nick were a good aim...once the blindfolds came off

Nya had the bat backwards

Little Alie was too sweet to hit the zebra hard

Zane was ready for action

We brought in the big guns and had Addie break it!

Z man opening his gifts

A gun.....he is in heaven

Dinosaurs....again, he is in heaven!

5 candles.....where does the time go?

Cupcakes made by Mommy

He can't even wait for Daddy to light the candles before we wants to blow them out!

Letting Daddy help him read his cards

That is one happy 5 year old my friends!

And this is one worn out Uncle Mike!

Tour de Cure

2009-06-16T12:02:00.008-06:00

What an amazing adventure Gabe and I shared together!

While the kids were off in Yellowstone with their Grammy,

we rode in the Tour de Cure which took place in Brigham City, UT.

The ride was created to raise money and awareness for the A.D.A.

Stats for the ride-

Distance- 61.29 miles

Time- 4:29:43

Money Raised- $400.00

Average m.p.h.- 13.5

(which I know could have been higher if it weren't for the breakdown on mile 50)

Max m.p.h.- 28.5

Here we have our race numbers and the route we followed.

We were the route highlighted in yellow.

Steve pinning on the race tag for Heidi and getting her all ready to go.

Heidi was our 'Red Rider'...meaning she has been diagnosed with diabetes, and is doing the tour.

What an amazing accomplishment!!

Ready to RIDE!!

A picture of all the gals before the ride.
Why am I always the tallest standing in the back??

A picture of the whole gang there to support Heidi

Memories of the Event-

No coffee at the Bas Ass Coffee rest stop...however, they did provide amazing cups of Joe at the breakfast, and after the ride! :)

Heidi and her suitcases she packed on her bike

Bringing our toaster from home, then not using it

Massive amounts of ice cream at Peach City and the employees believing Gabe was Edward Norton

Overcast weather and sunburnt knees!

Tube socks for arm warmers

The 100 mile rider telling his friends he wanted to 'cheat'

Almost being hit by a car

Cramps at mile 50

Eating mustard to get me through cramps on mile 50

Having 4 1/2 hours to fall in love with my husband all over again

Accomplishing something, and planning for many more rides in the future

Watching a friend cross the finish line in the pouring rain with her family

Eating Indian food after the ride and not tasting it at all

Pulling the covers up over my head after a long day, only to be smacked by the remote control and receiving a big ol' bump and bruise.

Heimlich Maneuver

2009-06-10T09:24:00.002-06:00

I had to do the Heimlich Maneuver on Noah last night at Subway. He was eating his meatball sub, then he kinda stood up and spit some stuff out of his mouth. I asked if he was okay, and noticed he could not talk. I grabbed him from the bench and asked his if he could breathe, and he just made a noise that made be believe he could not. I turned him around and started pushing up on his chest, and after a few times, a meatball flew out of his mouth and he gasped for air. All I could think was, "What if this doesn't work?"...."What will I do?" When it finally was dislodged, I just stood there shaking, and Noah started crying. I needed to get away from the kids so I could have a little breakdown without them seeing. We drove to my Mom's, and she talked with the kids while I took a few minutes to try and gather my thoughts.

I still have the horrible images of it in my mind, and I can not shake the "What If''s"

He is okay, his throat is sore, and his chest hurts.....but he is okay.

Thank God

Family Pictures-Spring 2009

2009-05-08T14:54:00.016-06:00

Here we are, the Griffith Family

Spring 2009 Edition

The 3 Ring Circus...(or AT&T commercial....how many bars do you have?)

Zane Michael Ryker- 4 years old

Noah Spencer- 10 years old

Adison Gabrielle- 16 years old

Sweet Sixteen ......

Gabriel and Heather

Haircut for Z

2009-05-05T11:08:00.002-06:00

I cut Z's hair last night.....it was time.....it was overdue. I hate it though, instead of a massive amount of poofy hair on his adorable head, we now see the skinny little grown up face of his.

Tears......

Sneek Peek

2009-05-04T21:19:00.001-06:00

We had our family pictures done a week ago....and here is a sneek peek.

I have not seen any of them yet, I just found this gem posted on her website.

Ink in progress

2009-04-29T11:54:00.003-06:00

I had more done on my arm last night,

and I thought I would post some pictures of my amazing work in progress.

Conversation with the Kids

2009-04-27T10:12:00.004-06:00

This is just a little part of a coversation we were having while driving to school

We were discussing people who question things in life-

Addie: I just don't want him (Caleb) to be put on the spot about certain things....... like religion.

Mom: No one is going to do that.

Addie: But he (Spencer) might bring it up, and I don't want it to be uncomfortable.

Mom: Just because someone questions something Addie, doesn't mean they don't hold certain beliefs. Life is a constant struggle, and with that, we question things, learn from them and grow along the way.

Noah: Yeah Addie, life is a constant struggle, like this morning, I was struggling to get my pants on.

Gotta love it!!

A Wirlwind Weekend For The Books.....the Marathon, Coachella and Coronado Island

2009-04-22T09:39:00.024-06:00

I have an AMAZING husband....okay, that is obvious just for the pure fact that he has put up with me for the last 17 years, but I am referring to his running.

He has now ran his 10th marathon, and is registered for another one this September...(Kauai....here we come!!)

He trains hard for months, sacrifices sleep and playtime just so he can take on this monster

and accomplish a goal that very few people can claim to have done.

In my eyes, he is nothing short of AMAZING.

Look, it looks like he is giving us the ol' thumbs up!!

While Gabe was pounding the 26.2 miles of pavement, Melissa and I ran our first 5k.

That maybe nothing compared to the marathon, but to me it was a major accomplishment, and one I plan to continue until I can post a time worthy of all the blood sweat and tears it takes a gal like me to do. I am so happy I shared that with Melissa, she is an amazing friend, and I miss her, so having 3.1 miles to just talk to her was something I loved.

Immediately following the marathon, we headed home so Gabe could have an ice bath before we headed to the airport. That's right, within 2 hours of running the marathon, we were at the airport catching a flight to San Diego for an extraordinary weekend that I will never forget.

A little sleepy Gabe?

The plane was so empty, we were actually able to have a whole row to ourselves, which was really nice for Gabe to be able to stretch his legs out and relax before we arrived.

San Diego is one of our favorite cities in the world!!
Even a short 2 day trip is so worth the time and stress it takes to get us there.
Who couldn't be happy with a pretty little flower greeting us at the airport that looks like something out of a Dr. Suess book?

We decided to stay in San Diego for the night instead of driving right to Indio to see The Cure play Coachella the next day. A few days before we left, I booked us a room at the Crown Plaza, and I am so glad we did. The room was beautiful, the view was spectacular, and the bed could equally be compared to sleeping on a cloud.

After we checked in, we headed to India Palace, our all time favorite Indian restaurant that we visit every time we come. We then picked up a few things at Whole Foods and Target that we would need for the next day before heading back to our heavenly bed for the night.

We both woke up early the next morning, well rested and decided to take our time before hitting the road. We stopped for some bagels and Jamba Juice before hitting the road for the 2 1/2 drive that awaited us.

The drive to Indio seemed to last forever, and as much as I appreciate the GPS we brought, I was sick of listening to 'Robot Lady' tell me what to do. I never was much for authority!
As soon as we met up with Kim in Palm Springs, we headed to Indio for Coachella, which was going to be an insane day full of hot sun, awesome bands and
crowds like I have never seen before.

Here is a cute car that passed us while we were in line to park.

I had to post the picture of the a/c knob Kim accidentally broke by pushing it all the way into the dash. I did not however get a picture if the cone she ran over, or the car she cut off......silly Kimmy, good thing she bought the insurance!!

The lines to get into the venue were insane, and the crowds inside were even worse, but hey what did I expect, there were 150,000 people there! We picked up a Cure shirt and looked for a Drive by Truckers shirt for Gabe that Kim didn't buy the day before, but unfortunately, they were not selling them on Sunday.

This is what $6.00 looks like, a bottle of Gatorade and Water. It actually wasn't a bad price considering what a lot of venues charge.

Earplugs were also a must!!

They had a lot of artsy fartsy stuff around, and one of the things I loved the most was the

golf cart they decorated for Amy Winehouse. She was actually suppose to perform at Coachella,

but didn't.....big surprise!

Kim and I waiting under a tent for the next band to come on.

Gabe and I

Gabe and Kim

I took this picture as we were headed to the main Coachella stage, where we planned to sit our butts down and wait until The Cure came on...(4 hours later)

I can not even begin to describe how big it was, and none of the pictures I took do it justice. There were 6 stages with bands playing at all times. There were drinking areas set-up, and mini dance clubs all over. It was crazy. They had a section in the middle you could go to and get hosed down to cool off from the blazing sun.

Finally we have arrived at the main stage!

The view of the sunset was spectacular.

Kim was either sick of waiting for The Cure to come on, or she was sick of me taking her picture. I would say it was a little of both.

I took this picture on the west side of where we were sitting.

All along the side were drinking stations and a sea of people for as far as the eye could see.

The Yeah, Yeah Yeah's were great.

Her outfit was by far the coolest thing I have ever seen and her voice was amazing.

FINALLY!! The reason we were crazy enough to sit in the desert all day sweating ....

THE CURE

All the pictures I took were of the screens, because there was no way I could have gotten a decent picture of them on the actual stage.

They played for about 2 1/2 hours. They did an amazing job, and it was all worth it in the end. After their second encore, they were told the could only play one more song, but apparently Robert was still annoyed from being cut short when they played in Vegas the Friday before and didn't want to stop playing for us. As he started to sing 'Boys Don't Cry', they cut the sound. He still played and everyone rushed the stage and sang out loud with him. Even as they turned off the screens and turned on the lights, he still sang three more songs.

It was a monumental moment, and I was so happy to have been there for it!!

Take us home and put us to bed!!

As we left, people started jumping all over some of the art they had set-up,

and ripping it apart.

Those crazy kids!

I turned around one more time to get a glimpse of the massive amount of people leaving, and again, the pictures just do not do it justice!

We went back to Palm Springs and slept for a few hours before we headed back to San Diego.

It was going to be a long drive considering the night we had before, but at last.......

Coronado awaits!!

Gabe and I headed right to one of our favorite places in San Diego....Coronado Island where we spent the last remaining hours of our trip before heading back to Salt Lake City.

We just layed back and ran our fingers through the soft sand while listening to the ocean

and an occasional plane flying overhead.

It was perfect.

Like I said to Gabe,

"Time to find me a job where they pay me to do this everyday!"

Way too close to the camera, but oh well!!

It was a crazy weekend, about as non-stop as you could imagine,

but it was worth every second.

We came, we saw,

we left our mark!!

Until we see you again.....

"You stay classy San Diego"

Easter Dance

2009-04-13T20:42:00.002-06:00

Nikki and Adison went to the Spring Dance for Itineris last Friday.

They ate them some fried chicken and did the boot scootin' boogie.

Pretty Girls

Adison ended up dancing with some giant that was like 6 foot 8 and liked to do homework.

It would never have worked out

One last party....I promise!!

2009-04-07T11:41:00.005-06:00

This has been a loooong week, let me tell you!! It started off with Noah's birthday on Monday, then Adison's birthday on Thursday, my Dad's birthday on Friday as well as Noah's birthday party that night, karate testing on Saturday morning, followed by Adison's birthday party on Saturday night, then finally a party with friends and family on Sunday to celebrate 3 very special people, celebrating 3 very special birthdays-

Adison- 16 (semi-sweet)

Noah-10 (double digits)

Dad- 60 (old man!)

It is hard to get a picture of Adison when she doesn't want to look at the camera.

C'mon 16 year old, let us see that pretty face!!

My Dad and Noah opening gifts.

I think he looks dang good for a 60 year old man!

Gabe stopping to pose for a picture

Zane was trying so hard all night to blow hard enough on this frog toy to get his tongue to come out. After a lot of trying, he finally did it.

Obviously he was thrilled to have his picture taken

Nikki showing off her party spirit with some type of tinsel around her head

Obie with a tinsel mustache of some type

Kim with Izzy and Brooklyn.

Spencer and Chandra

Thank god we had a small break from the snow to have a good ol' b.b.q.

The menu consisted of-

Hamburgers

Brats

Pasta Salad

Garden Salad

Chips

Cheesecake and

Apple Crisp

I am happy to now get our lives back to normal after the week of festivities.

Whatever normal may be in the Griffith household.

WORST MOM EVER!!

2009-04-07T11:13:00.003-06:00

This is the only picture I have from Adison's 16th Birthday party on Saturday night. I actually took this picture the next day, so.....that's even worse!!

I don't know what happened or why, but I totally forgot to take pictures.

I am so sorry Goonie....you know you mean the world to me!!

Adison started her night off by going to a movie with some friends, than they came back to our house for pizza from The Pie, a Little Mermaid cake, and then a sleepover.

Ummmm... I don't know what to say, I am kinda embarrassed.

All I have to record the evening is a half eatin cake.......

MOTHER OF THE FREAKIN" YEAR!!

Noah's 10th Birthday Party at Classic Skating

2009-04-07T10:37:00.006-06:00

We started the crazy weekend we had ahead of us at Classic skating to celebrate our big guy turning 10!! We had Noah's birthday party here last year too, although a few minutes into the party, he came down with a massive fever and ended up sleeping in the corner and missed the WHOLE thing.

We were so happy that he was feeling good

and was actually awake for his party this year!!

This kid LOVES his LEGOS!!

Ice cream with plastic teeth in it.

Batman cupcakes......of course!!

The group posing for a picture. We had Tyler, Ashlyn, McKayla, Kaylie, Zane, Brooklyn, Izzy, Noah, Kyena and Azean. Absent from the photo is Adison and Nikki.

Z man being his silly self. He hates stopping for pictures.

As you can tell, the girls are more than happy to have their pictures taken.

Here is Kyena....

Brooklyn....

Ashlyn....

Adison and Nikki....

Finally....a boy!! Here's Tyler on the his scooter....

The birthday boy himself....Noah

The smoke machine was going nuts.

We had a private room for the party called the F/X room. It had it's own smoke machine and lasers light, etc... At the end of the party, the kids thought it would be funny to keep pressing the smoke machine and fill the whole room. Then they opened the door, and started filling the entire skating area with smoke too! Dem' kids are crazy I tell ya'!

Overall we had a great time, and were so happy to be celebrating

Noah and his 10 awesome years!

16 years old....Are you kidding me!!

2009-04-02T22:15:00.011-06:00

It is so hard for me to believe that Adison is now 16!

She is the same age Gabe and I were when we meet each other and fell in love.

Crazy I say, just bananas!

Nikki and I wanted to decorate Addies room to suprise her when she woke up.

Let me tell you, trying to get her to fall asleep downstairs on a school night was NOT easy!!

She was pretty mad at me and didn't understand why I was making such a fuss about her staying downstairs, she just wanted to sleeeeep!!

That was until she woke, went to her room this morning and saw what Nikki and I were up to until 2:00 in the morning while she slept.

Nothing was safe from the streamers and crepe paper

I think it turned out pretty good, what do you think??

That's right....Sweet 16 already! I wouldn't call her sweet though, more like semi-sweet.
I think that is more fitting.

Just kidding baby....I love you!

Birthday Pictures

2009-03-30T21:09:00.006-06:00

Making a wish.......I bet he is wishing for LEGOS!!

Well, I HOPE he was wishing for LEGOS

That's right..........10 candles

Birthday balloons from his sister and Grandma

That is what I like to call one cool 10 year old!!

Happy 10th Birthday Noah

2009-03-30T09:19:00.006-06:00

We have reached double digits!!

(I did not get a picture of him this morning,

so please enjoy one of my favorite pictures of him from our visit to

Universal Studios this last fall)

As of 5:17 a.m. this morning, Noah is 10 years old today. Yah!! He is growing up so fast!! He started the day off early by coming in to my room when it was still dark and said, "Good morning Mom, isn't there something you would like to say to me?" I thought........"Yes, thank you for NOT making me fight to get you ready for school." "Not exactly what I had in mind Mom!" he replied. I then grabbed me a bunch of 10 year old love and hugged the crap out of him.

We got him a birthday cake, and plan on bringing it in to his school today to share with his classmates. As per Noah's request, we will be making 'our own' pizza for dinner, and he wants confetti cake for dessert. We wont be having his party until this Friday, but we will have our own celebration at home until then.

Double digits though, DOUBLE DIGITS!!

Noah's Last Cardiologist Appointment

2009-03-17T12:22:00.003-06:00

This is a previous post from my other blog regarding Noah's last cardiologist appointment in October of 2008.

Sometime there are things you hear that take you a while to grasp, and memories of what 9 years of having a child with a heart problem have been like. There is no other way to describe it but a roller coaster. You are looking for hope everywhere you look, while being overflowed with information that you are still trying to grasp.

"How did this happen to OUR child?"
"What went wrong, what did I do?"
"What does the future hold?"

There has never been a moment in my life that I considered Noah anything short of a miracle. ALL children are miracles, but Noah has stunned the medical world with his progress. Even at times when I heard the words, "Noah has to go back to surgery.......again", a time when I just wanted scream, "WHY HIM???, WHY DOES HE HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS?" He not only overcame everything, he did most of it in record time. Is it possible to forget every surgery your child has gone through? I know I can sit down and write it down, but it is a moment you anticipate, you dread, you look forward to, a moment when they are going to help give your child life, but at the same moment, take him from you loving arms, when you have nothing to do put put all your hope in miracle workers, and sit empty in a waiting room where you actually count down every single minute of the 6-8 hours on the ticking clock. The best way I can describe it is to think of holding your breathe for that long. Even the moment when you see the surgeon enter the door, you sink farther in the hole, until he smiles at you, giving you that instant moment of knowing he made it through surgery. The surgery itself is just one major part of it. Then you still deal with the progress and set backs that come in the ICU. It really never ends, but you take life minute by minute, because that is what you have at the time. Sitting back and looking at those memories, I still can not believe that Gabe and I survived that. It was never easy, but it was a time in my life where I proved I had more courage than I ever thought possible.

Even when he has a doctor appointment scheduled for nothing more than a check up, I feel a sinking pit in my stomach. As he lays in in a dark room, getting an echo cardiogram, my mind transforms itself back to watching a small baby laying sedated as I try to read the sonogram machine, like I have any idea what I am looking at. I blink and realize that I am watching an amazing 9 year old boy, who grows and thinks and learns and absorbs every bit of the world around him. He has an amazing future ahead of him, a future that I feared for every minute of his precious life.Noah is doing amazing. His cardiologist said we could not possibly hope for anything better at this point, in fact, he is doing better than ever could be expected. He is a miracle and has baffled the medical world. He has every bit of confidence that he will grow up to be an old man with grandchildren running around driving him nuts.

That is my son, my Noah.